Hey tweeps, have you already seen Laci Green’s video on sexual objectification? It’s SPOT ON! I’d like to comment on this and insert the topic of feminist porn in all this. But first, check it out.

Sexual Objectification

I used to say that objectification is fine, in a sexual context only, as long as it goes both ways. But, I think I mixed up the terms of objectification and sexual desire and attraction. As Green explains, objectification is about considering the person as a sexual object only, instead of a complex individual with thoughts and desires of their own.

She also points out that women are seen as the object of sex, unlike men who are subjects. Basically this means that women are passive and that men are active and control their sexuality.

We see this all the time, not only in porn, but also in real life, every day. Women are depicted as objects, things to have sex with, and their worth is directly linked to their “doability”.

However, there is a difference between finding someone attractive and objectifying someone. Women are people! Crazy idea, huh? Most people will go “well, duh”, but it’s not what reality reflects. When a guy catcalls a woman and then says “You should know how to accept a compliment”. This is the most frustrating and hypocritical thing. Being viewed and talked to like an object that your only goal is to have sex with, is NOT right.

I was reading a few comments on Green’s video – I know, big mistake – and some people still think, apparently, that women ARE sexual. That’s what they are, and nothing else. And they even blame Laci for showing cleavage and thus, of being part of the problem. Yeah, she has big boobs, so what? It’s fine to be attracted to her, but not to blame her for it! It’s freaking ridiculous, and I’ve had enough with this rape culture crap. A woman shouldn’t have to hide her body, or be ashamed of it, or even scared that showing a bit of skin will get her harassed or put down by other people. This shows a deeply-rooted hatred of women. I am NOT saying that all men are evil, believe me, but our culture is based on this kind of sexism and we have to free ourselves from it.

Objectification in porn

So how does that play out in porn? I mean, the goal of porn is to show sex and to give pleasure to the people watching it. But if you look at how the characters are portrayed, there is no individuality, and it looks more like a meat fight than an actual sexual experience. Mainstream porn depicts women like holes that men can treat in whatever way they want to reach their own pleasure. The woman is an object, a tool. And to be honest, I think this kind of content is also sexist to men. It deprives them of personality as well, and spreads the cliché of the “macho man” bullshit.

That’s where feminist porn comes in. It does not aim at blaming, hating or ignoring men, it’s about reestablishing this equal relationship between men and women, and depicting sex with two – or more… – sexual subjects.

Sexual omnivores

On a not so unrelated topic, today, I was reading this fascinating article about the book Sex At Dawn, and there was a video of a Ted Talk in which the co-author, Christopher Ryan, explained how this relationship between shame and sex began not so long ago (if we look at the big picture) during a now outdated Victorian era. Before that, our ancestors would have sex freely, with lots of different partners, and everything was merry! I’m talking about this because beside sexual objectification, beside being treated like an object in today’s society, a woman also has to deal with the puritanical conundrum of the virgin/slut. This really shows that women are not at the wheel of their sexuality and still suffer the hypocritical judgement of society when they do have sex.

What to do?

Treat anybody like a human being, how about that?